Se ha ido una grande, adiós María.

 

Cuando uno decide ser psicólogo no es consciente del impacto que el trato con pacientes día a día puede tener en tu vida privada. La relación en terapia es bilateral, ambos aprendemos, ambos cometemos errores. Cambian nuestras prioridades, encajamos aprendizajes, caminamos juntos
Hay pacientes que uno recuerda vagamente, algunos detalles, algunos matices, y hay pacientes que te marcan, te mueven y desde el primer día que los conoces sabes que no vuelves a ser la misma. 
María fue así, desde que entró en consulta lo sentí, su lenguaje no verbal siempre seguro, su mirada inquieta y perspicaz, retadora y desafiante, madre y esposa. Si,  todo esto y más era María. 
Le diagnosticaron un cáncer de hígado en el 2007, sus niños eran pequeños, le angustiaba la muerte, y sus niños. Hacía muchas preguntas, y creo que eran más de las que llegaba a verbalizar, su cabeza nunca paraba, controlaba todo, desde el jersey que se ponía su hija, hasta la lista de la compra del próximo mes. Su voz siempre suave y enérgica, pequeña de talla y extragrande de fortaleza, no de la física, de la de dentro, de la que importa.
Desde el principio encaró la enfermedad mirándola a los ojos, retándola, tenía claro que no le iba a dar más espacio en su vida que el necesario, que su vida no giraría en torno al cáncer, y así fue, lo logró.
Preparó la comunión de sus hijos, organizó cumpleaños, recorrió Roma, viajó a su tierra, escaló montañas, se hizo mechas, y preparó pasteles. 
No permitió que el tratamiento le robara su capacidad de disfrutar, sólo le dejaba que le quitara la energía por un par de días, ella misma se daba permiso a descansar,  y después, a seguir estando al tanto de todos los suyos. Era una cuidadora nata, lo tenía en automático, siempre cuidando a los demás, cuidando los detalles, si, a María le gustaban los detalles. 
Amaba a sus hijos y a su marido, les ayudó a ser fuertes, les ayudó a crecer. 
Su llanto nunca fue de pena, era de rabia, de impotencia, de no poder controlar su cuerpo y su fuerza a su antojo, no puedo decir que no haya tenido momentos bajos, claro que sí, que era humana, pero jamás permitió que las lágrimas cambiaran su esencia. Siempre renacía y cada vez más fuerte, con las cosas más claras.
Le dí de alta a mediados del 2010, con la promesa de que me buscase en momentos de confusión. De vez en cuando sabía de ella por su oncólogo, y siempre bien, pasando todas sus revisiones con sobresaliente.
Hace apenas una semana me llamó  para decirme que estaba ingresada, que quería saludarme. Se me oprimió el corazón. Al entrar a su habitación, allí estaba, sentada, comiendo un croissant de jamón y queso, me recibió con su sonrisa de siempre, la sonrisa de María. Cuatro años sin verla y su mirada se sentía igual, brillante e inteligente, evaluadora. Más delgada que nunca. Me habló de sus viajes, me enseñó fotos de sus hijos con el mismo brillo de orgullo de siempre, no había cambiado en nada. 
Su médico había decidido cambiar de tratamiento, este ya no estaba funcionando. María ya había pasado por varios cambios de ruta, y siempre había sabido adaptarse al nuevo camino, pero ahora era diferente. Esta vez no quiso profundizar más en el tema, lo noté en su mirada, yo fingí no darme cuenta. Me dejó ver que le preocupaban sus hijos, que no sabía como iban a encajar este nuevo cambio de ruta, le prometí darles seguimiento y acompañarles en el proceso. En su petición noté algo diferente, no era sólo que sus niños encajaran la caída de pelo, le preocupaba algo más, su mirada me lo decía. Ella sabía que quedaba poco, y así fue. 
Hoy recibí la llamada. María se fue el día de su santo, se fue como siempre había querido, sin ruido y en un par de horas, sin mucho jaleo. Rodeada de sus hijos y su marido, les preparó para este momento desde el principio,  y ellos supieron despedirse, supieron estar, le hablaron, le besaron, le dieron las gracias y le pidieron perdón, lo hicieron tan bien gracias a ella. En su última tarea obtuvo sobresaliente, como tenía que ser en María. 
Aunque ya  tenía sus ojos cerrados, sé que se habrá sentido orgullosa de su legado. Poca gente sabe que el último sentido que se pierde es el oído, y sé que ella escuchó hasta el último te quiero. 
Le recordaré siempre. De eso estoy segura. Recordaré su mirada desafiante cuando le contradecía sus hipótesis, su sonrisa pícara cuando derrumbaba las mías, y su abrazo cálido cada vez que se despedía. He aprendido mucho de ella, como psicóloga, como mujer, como madre y como esposa. Ella creía que después de la muerte nos reencontrábamos. Espero que así sea, le echaré mucho de menos.
Gracias María.

Psicóloga-Psicooncóloga
Mª Luisa Pedrero Gil



 

                                   www.psicologiadelcancer.com

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Libro de visitas

Introduce el código.
* Campos obligatorios
  • mercedes castro leon (martes, 14. marzo 2017 13:21)

    mi madre estuvo con luisa solo 4 sesiones y ya le ha dado el alta, se encuentra genial, la recomiendo mucho

  • Basi Martín Fernández (miércoles, 08. marzo 2017 12:15)

    Buenas tardes, quisiera concertar una cita para mi padre. Padece un colangiocarcinoma desde el 2014.

  • angelica servin sanchez (sábado, 08. octubre 2016 20:23)

    gracias por sus videos y su audios yo perdi una gran amiga joven muy joven 46 años y duele el alma haberla visto como se fue consumiendo con esa enfermedad que le diagnosticaron el 15 de agosto y
    para el 25 murio :( :(

  • Juani 1987 (martes, 02. febrero 2016 18:54)

    la sicologa me ayudo a quererme un poco mas y a dejar de hecharme la culpa por todo muchos besos

  • Esperanza G. Gil (viernes, 20. noviembre 2015 08:23)

    es super directa y clara, a mi hermana y a mi nos ha espabilao con el cancer de mi madre, ademas es muy buena persona

  • Laura Sanz (jueves, 19. noviembre 2015 17:52)

    Gracias por la página, hacen falta más personas como usted que realmente nos entienda.

  • Yolanda Calles (martes, 21. julio 2015 11:41)

    Me encantan tus videos!!! GRACIAS

  • Sandra Muñoz Soto (sábado, 27. junio 2015 10:50)

    Soy Sandra desde Santiago de Chile, y quiero decirle que me gusta mucho su página! Ojalá y aquí en Chile hubiera psiconcologia
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  • Daniela Camacho Gonzalez (sábado, 20. junio 2015 20:17)

    Hermoso relato. Me quedo sin palabras. Gracias x compartirlo Maria Luisa. Saludos.

  • maricarmen garcia jimenez (jueves, 11. junio 2015 10:52)

    yo estube en la terapia de duelo cuando murio mi madre el año pasado y conosi gente maravillosa y la psicologa nos ayudo mucho un abrazo con mucha luz

  • Laura Gomez Arriate (sábado, 06. junio 2015 19:06)

    tengo una amiga que lo esta pasando mal con un cancer pero no quiere ir al psicologo me dijeron que usted tambien les llamaba por telefono para darles pautas, es verdad? el marido de mi amiga estaria
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    Laura Gomez Arriate

  • Lore Lopez (lunes, 01. junio 2015 11:02)

    tuve la oportunidad de verte en una conferencia en el palacio de congresos y me ayudo muchoo. ¿pasas consulta en malaga? gracias

  • Maricruz Burgos (miércoles, 11. marzo 2015 17:04)

    me gusto mucho el taller de las emociones y el cancer, es verdad que ves las cosas diferente. gracias

  • Carmen Villa (martes, 17. febrero 2015 20:40)

    Hola, mi prima estubo en los grupos de familiares y le fue muy bien donde me puedo apuntar para los grupos de marzo
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  • Padilla Mirta (miércoles, 07. enero 2015 00:32)

    Desde Zárate. Argentina. Gracias por información. Comparto la utilidad de la psicooncologia.

  • Jose moreno (domingo, 28. diciembre 2014 23:13)

    ¿hacen terapias grupales? ¿cual es su costo?

  • Mariana Burgati (lunes, 08. diciembre 2014 10:38)

    Desde Argentina muchos saludos, me encanta la página, que pena que aquí no hayan estos servicios.

  • Maria Torres Garcia (domingo, 23. noviembre 2014 23:50)

    Gracias por ayudar a mi hermana desde España, eres un amor de persona!! Mil gracias Luisa

  • luis cortes (lunes, 10. noviembre 2014 10:18)

    me has ayudado mucho gracias luis cortes

  • Ainhoa Santamaria (viernes, 07. noviembre 2014 19:05)

    me gusta como escribes deberias escribir un libro jeje saludos desde Bilbao! que pena no teneros más cerca

  • Raquel Duran (jueves, 30. octubre 2014 21:48)

    Nos has ayudado mucho a todos, muchas gracias yo no creia en esto de la psicologia pero veo en mi padre que si da resultado x siempre gracias!!!!!!! xoxo